Answering the question 'What do you do?'

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

So what do you do? It's a pretty common question that we're all asked, It's how we get to know each other and it gives us something to talk about when meeting new people. It's all well and good when you have a job, but when you're unemployed it's an uncomfortable question that can invite judgement from those around you.

If you've only been unemployed for a short time this question may not phase you. It's just another question that you answer and move on, it may even help you find a job. As the duration of your unemployment increases though, you're asked the question more and more and you begin to feel judgement from those that ask it. How long have they been looking? Why hasn't this person found a job yet? Are they doing something wrong? Do they even want a job?

Sometimes the judgement is real and sometimes it's just imagined. Either way the question becomes something you hate answering and something you try to avoid as much as possible. If this sounds familiar to you, you're not alone.

We're often valued by what we do rather than who we are. When you are unemployed people don't know where you fit in society, so assumptions are made. A common assumption about the unemployed is that they're lazy, that they don't want to work. Now there are those out there that don't want to work, that are happy to take advantage of the system. But this isn't every unemployed person. Unfortunately, the minority spoils it for the majority causing many to unfairly label people as bludgers.

It only takes a couple of bad experiences to assume that everyone is judging you when they ask the question, so what do you do? But is everyone judging you, or are you just expecting them to based off past experiences? You may doubt yourself, you may feel like you're not valuable, but don't let other people's opinions of you get you down. Assume in each situation that there is no judgement and go from there.

If you do end up in a conversation where others are clearly judging you or looking down upon you, and what you say doesn't change their opinion of you, don't waste your time on them. They don't know your situation or what you've been doing, and are just letting their own opinions of unemployed people cloud their judgement. For everyone else, having a positive attitude definitely helps.

Now sometimes even if you're with supportive people, you just don't want to talk about your situation and all the follow up questions that may be asked. That's perfectly fine, but ignoring the question or walking away from the conversation will send the wrong message, and invite assumptions and judgement from those in the conversation. Provide a short answer that gives information and then moves the conversation along.

Try something like,

I'm currently between jobs at the moment, how about you, what do you do?

Or

I've worked in the retail industry, how about you, what do you do?

Short and simple replies like this provide an answer and then move the conversation along. They signal that you're done talking and it's now the other person's turn to talk. This strategy isn't fool proof and it doesn't always stop follow up question. It just depends on how out going or polite other people in the conversation are. They may be generally interested and want to know more about you. Or, they may continue the conversation, asking questions so it doesn't appear that they're uninterested in what you have to say.

This is a question you will eventually face. Hopefully you now have an idea on how to handle situations where this question comes up.

Would you like to comment on this article?

Name:
Location:
Comments:
	Please type the red letters and numbers into the red box above. This is to protect our system from SPAM and viruses.

Previous Comments

There are no comments for this blog post as yet. If you have recently commented then please be patient while your comment is reviewed by our staff.